Mmm...steak!

Yesterday when I got home from work, a guy in a pickup stopped me as I was walking up my driveway. I figured he just needed directions or something, but then he asks me if I want to buy some steaks. I quickly declined and turned to go inside, but you know how salesmen can be. He persisted until finally I walked over to his truck just to shut him up. It was then that I remembered that my friend, Eddie, used to do this same type of thing. (Some of my friends will remember crazy Eddie, Ben’s cousin.) He’d buy steaks from this company and then sell them for a small profit. The more meat you move, the more money you make. And then I remembered how good those steaks were that Eddie used to sell. Bacon-wrapped filet mignon, butterflied filets, t-bones, you name it. And they were pretty fairly priced. So this guy starts his schpiel and tells me that he’s selling these $10 steaks for $3 each. Sounds great. I figure I’ll buy two or three of them and he’ll be on his way. Not quite. He pulls out this case of 40 steaks and says I have to buy the whole thing and it’s $200. No thank you. He starts pulling the steaks out and they look great, but there was one small problem: he was keeping them in a cooler in the bed of his truck. Who knows how long they’ve been in there…probably all day. I’m guessing those steaks were about the same temperature as the sweaty baseball cap he was wearing. OSHA would have a fit if they saw the “refrigeration system” he was using.
I wish you the best, sir, with selling your bacteria-ridden, month-old tepid t-bones. And mercy on anyone who actually buys any of that stuff!

The Finest in Personal Protection...

...the Glock 23. (I snagged the photo from gundirectory.com.) I'm thinking about getting one with my tax return this year. It's the "official service pistol of the FBI and countless police authorities." It's the compact brother of the standard size Glock 22; both are .40 caliber. I figure the smaller size of the 23 will be easier for Beth to handle should she ever have to use it. I'm looking forward to taking her to the range to fire off a few rounds. She'll enjoy it once she gets the hang of it.

Speaking of guns, check out this grandma with her machine gun...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SvLVcbX2Hnk

Never Eat Yellow Snow...

You know all the great cliché advice you get from friends like "never eat yellow snow?" Well, one of those pearls of wisdom needs amended. What do you hear when you tell someone that you’re going to Mexico? “Don’t drink the water,” right? Well, they should add, “or eat the ice” onto the end of that statement. I mean, I know it seems like common sense…ice is, after all, just frozen water. But when someone tells you not to drink the water in Mexico, I always think of water out of a tap…or a hose…or a puddle someone just bathed in. I don’t usually think of ice in my drink at a nice restaurant, or a nice cup of shaved ice…
Well, I decided to take my new bride to Hotel Secreto on Isla Mujeres, Mexico for our honeymoon. The island was beautiful, filled with markets, restaurants, and a fresh Caribbean breeze. We fell in love with the pina coladas on the island (virgin ones, of course). They were so much fresher and fruitier tasting down there! We would usually order them in restaurants at dinner, but by the end of the week we were craving them within an hour of waking up. Well, two days before we were scheduled to leave, we were swimming in the hotel pool when suddenly we were struck with the urgent need for a pina colada. I stepped up to the poolside bar and promptly ordered two drinks. I slapped a few pesos down on the counter and swaggered back to the pool, proud of the fact that I could so swiftly provide for my wife’s every whim. Later that day, we both had to…well…let’s just say we were both having some gastro-intestinal problems. The next day and a half were not the most romantic we’d ever spent together.
It took me a while to figure out what had happened, but then it struck me…it had to have been the shaved ice in our pina coladas from the poolside bar. I didn’t think it was a problem because we’d been drinking them all week with no problems, but the restaurants we’d been to must have filtered their ice for the drinks or something.
The moral of the story is: If you’re going to Mexico, don’t drink the water…or eat the ice!

My nephew

Here's a pic of my cute little nephew, Cameron...Kathy and Brian's pride and joy. He's a spunky little guy and always happy. Beth and I were visiting them a few weeks ago and he was sick for part of our trip. Even so, he wasn't fussy at all. Even when Kath keeps him up late, he has a smile on his face until his head hits the pillow...and I do mean "hits." For some strange reason, when Cameron gets really tired, he bangs his head against the bottom of his crib. We had to actually put extra padding in his pack-n-play when he came here because he would constantly bang his head at night. Maybe it's the Beethoven they play for him every night...

A Magical Evening

Have you ever wanted to box someone after watching Rocky? Or how about street racing right after finishing Gone in Sixty Seconds? Well, tonight some friends of ours came over to watch The Illusionist. It wasn't as good as The Prestige, but it was entertaining nonetheless. So after the movie, all the guys started pulling out our best magic tricks...when I say best, I mean the only ones we know. Matt could barely remember his pen-cap trick, Ben's quarter trick didn't impress too many, and Cathy figured out my card trick within minutes. I don't think any of us will be opening for David Blaine anytime soon.

First Post

I've been starting to feel left behind by the unfaltering conquest of the "Technology Age." I mean, it's 2007 and I've never written a single blog. I'm from a simpler time when Commodore 64's ruled the gaming community, and the internet was little more than a twinkle in Al Gore’s eye. Today, in a world full of PS3's and Segways, the most advanced piece of electronic gadgetry I own is the green iPod mini I got for free at work. But all of that is about to change…

I've recently married my favorite person in the world, Bethany. We’re just starting out and don’t have much money, so although I’m as fascinated as the next guy with all the shiny new electronics rolling out this year, I doubt I’ll be buying any of them. Blogging is free, so this will have to be my single lifeline to the information superhighway. It’ll also be a good way for me to update my family and friends with news and pictures about me and Beth’s adventures together.

Until next time…