from the mouths of...microbiologists

Here’s a gem from one of my coworkers:
“Hey, you know that show Simpsons?”
“Yeah.”
“What’s Marge’s last name? You know the blue-haired lady?”
Are you kidding me? “Umm…I believe it’s…Simpson.”
“Wha…OH! Haha!”

This nugget was from the same person (bear in mind, (s)he is a scientist):
“You know that natural gas stuff?”
“Yes.”
“Well, it comes from the ground, right?”
“Yes.”
“Well, when we use it, does it...like...grow...itself...more?”
Yes, that’s exactly what it does. It grows itself more.